What do you call watches linking up to form a belt?

A complete waist of time.

Holy Water

How do you make holy water?

You boil the hell out of it.

Gallon Jug

The inventor of the gallon jug died today.

Tributes have been pouring in.

Samsung Store

What do you call a group of security guards outside a Samsung store?

Guardians of the Galaxy.

Calendar Manufacturer

I used to have a job at a calendar manufacturer but got fired because I took a couple days off.